from
New Jersey Practice Volume 10, Family Law and Practice,
S.R. Winters and T.D. Baldwin, (1999), West Group: St. Paul, MN.

THIS AGREEMENT, made on the ____ day of _____ , [year], by and between

______________________________________ , residing at ______________________
____________________________ , ______________________________, New Jersey (hereinafter referred to as “the Father”), and ____________________________________ ______________________________________ , presently residing at ___________________________________, ______________________________, New Jersey (hereinafter referred to as “the Mother”), as follows:

WITNESSETH:

WHEREAS, the parties were married on _________ in _________ and said marriage still subsists; and

WHEREAS, the parties have _______ (______) children; to wit, ______________ all of whom shall be collectively referred to as “the children,” and independently by their first names; and

WHEREAS, due to unfortunate circumstances having arisen between the parties, they have been involved in a custody dispute pending in the Superior Court of New Jersey, Chancery Division, Family Part, ____________ County, and which matter bears docket no. _______________; and

WHEREAS, the parties desire that this Agreement, which is entered into after due deliberation, shall constitute an agreement between them with respect to the care and custody of the children. The parties acknowledge, however, that this Agreement does not resolve all issues that may have arisen between them, including but not limited to, support, equitable distribution of marital property, attorney’s fees, etc. The parties hereby reserve these issues for determination at a future date; and

WHEREAS, the parties, each having their own unique views and beliefs with respect to a custody and timesharing arrangement in the children’s best interests, have participated in a custody and timesharing evaluation conducted by the mutually agreed upon and court appointed custody expert, ________________________; and

WHEREAS, the parties, each believing that it is in their children’s best interests to avoid a contested custody trial, agree to settle the issue of custody primarily based on ____________’s findings and recommendations. The parties agree to the terms and conditions as more particularly set forth in this Agreement after lengthy consideration and with the assistance of their respective counsel and the custody expert, _________________; and

WHEREAS, the parties have each participated in the negotiations of this Agreement with the assistance of independent counsel, and freely and voluntarily enter into the same. Each party is satisfied with all disclosures, financial and otherwise, made by the other during the course of the aforesaid custody dispute and desire to incorporate into this Agreement all resolutions made in connection with their aforesaid negotiations; and

WHEREAS, the parties have each been represented by independent counsel of their own choice, Father being represented by the law firm of ____________________, with offices located at ___________________________, and Mother having been represented by the law firm of _____________________________, with offices located at ____________________________, and each party represents that they are satisfied with the services rendered by their respective counsel; and

NOW, THEREFORE, in consideration of the mutual promises, covenants, agreements and terms herein contained it is agreed by and between the parties as follows:

ARTICLE I

PURPOSE OF AGREEMENT

1.1 Parties’ Preservation and Non-Alienation of Children’s Affections.
The parties shall cooperate with respect to the children so as to advance the children’s health, emotional and physical well-being, and to give and afford the children the affection of both parties and a sense of security. Neither party will, directly or indirectly, do anything that may have any tendency to prejudice the children against the other party. The parties will affirmatively guide the children so as to promote a positive and affectionate relationship between them and each party. The parties will mutually determine all matters relating to the health, education, safety and general welfare of the children. Every reasonable effort will be exerted to foster and maintain full access and unhampered contact between the children and respective parties. Neither party shall do anything that may have any tendency to estrange the children or injure the opinion of the children as to the other party or which may hamper the free and natural development of the love of each child for the other party.

ARTICLE II

2.1 Custody. The parties shall have joint legal custody of the children. Subject to the Husband’s timesharing rights as hereinafter set forth, [set forth custody arrangement]. Each party shall be permitted to make all ordinary “day-to-day” decisions concerning the children when the children are in that party’s primary care and custody. The parties agree that on all matters of importance concerning the children’s health, safety, education, religious upbringing, welfare and vacation/travel plans, they will notify and consult with each other in order to adopt and follow those policies that are in the children’s best interests. Each party shall notify the other in the event any child requires healthcare appointments, it being the parties’ desire to be informed of the status of all such healthcare and appointments for same. The parties shall communicate with each other on a periodic basis concerning the children's health, safety, education (specifically including without limitation, each child’s post-secondary school selection and application process), religious upbringing, welfare and vacation/travel plans. Neither party shall interfere with the other’s right to obtain all of the children’s school records, report cards, medical reports and such other documentation of like kind and character, or the other’s right to communicate with the children’s teachers, school personnel, health service providers of any nature, and other professionals that may be involved with the children. Each shall keep the other timely notified of the names and telephone numbers of all of the aforesaid individuals involved with the children as soon as they are known to them. Each party has an affirmative duty to promptly notify the other of illness or of such other significant and important matters affecting the children’s health, safety, education, religious upbringing, welfare and vacation/travel plans. Except in cases of emergency, neither party shall make any unilateral decision for any of the [number of] children with respect to the foregoing matters without first conferring with the other. Each party shall promptly notify the other of the address(es) and telephone number(s) where each may be contacted in the event of an emergency during any overnight period of time spent away from each party’s primary residence, whether or not any or all of the children are with them.

2.2 Timesharing. Considering the children’s respective ages and needs, the parties agree to adopt the following timesharing arrangements recommended by [insert expert’s name]. [Set forth specific timesharing arrangement.]

2.3 Right of First Refusal. In the event either party is unavailable to primarily supervise/care for any of the children during any overnight period of time, that party shall be obligated to promptly contact the other party of such unavailability, whereupon the other party shall be afforded the first opportunity to personally supervise/care for the children before any other caretaker is permitted to do so. The fact that the other may decline the opportunity to provide such personal care due to other plans, shall in no event be construed or interpreted in any context as that party not showing affection for or a desire to care for the children, and shall not be deemed a waiver of any future entitlement in this regard. Each party shall be permitted sole discretion to provide appropriate after-school care for the children when either is unavailable due to personal or employment obligations.

2.4 Religion. [Set forth specific religious preferences for children.]

2.6 Children’s Telephone Contact With Parents. Each child shall be permitted reasonable telephone contact with the non-primary caretaking parent. In the even either party leaves a telephone message for any child at the other party’s residence, the other party shall promptly relay the message to the child who shall be affirmatively encouraged to promptly return the call.

2.7 Illness. The parties shall keep each other promptly informed of any illness or accident of any child, and in the event that any such illness or accident causes such child to be confined to bed or home for a period of more than forty-eight hours, such other parent shall be permitted to visit the child at reasonable times and for reasonable periods at the other party’s residence.

2.8 Holiday Schedule. Notwithstanding anything to the contrary in the provisions set forth above, the parties agree to the following alternating holiday timesharing schedule:

HOLIDAY........................................2001........2002......2004 ..........2005(etc.)
Christmas/Christmas Eve ......................F ..........M ..........F ..........M
New Year’s Eve/New Year’s Day .......M ..........F ..........M ..........F
Mid-Winter Brk. ..................................M ..........F ..........M ..........F
Good Friday & Easter ..........................M ..........F ..........M ..........F
Spring Recess .....................................Split ..........Split ..........Split ..........Split
Mother’s Day ......................................M ..........M ..........M ..........M
Children’s Birthdays ............................Split ..........Split ..........Split ..........Split
Memorial Day .....................................F ..........M ..........F ..........M
Father’s Day .......................................F ..........F ..........F ..........F
4th of July ...........................................M ..........F ..........M ..........F
Father’s Birthday ................................F ..........F ..........F ..........F
Mother’s Birthday ...............................M ..........F ..........M ..........F
Halloween ...........................................F ..........F ..........F ..........F
Thanksgiving .......................................M ..........F ..........M ..........F

In the event that the children shall have holiday time that is not designated above, it is the parties’ intention to alternate them in each year. The foregoing schedule is intended to alternate each year. For purposes of implementing the holiday schedule set forth, he holiday periods shall be treated as separate from the alternate week arrangement, which shall resume after the holiday interruptions set forth below, as if the holiday interruption had not occurred. For example, if the child is with the Father during the week prior to the Spring Recess and each party is entitled to have the child for one half of the Spring Recess, the child shall be with the Mother upon the end of the Spring Recess.

2.9 Children’s Names to Remain the Same. Each child shall continue to be known by [his/her/their] name as set forth in the recitals to this Agreement and by no other name during their respective periods of unemancipation.

2.10 Terms of Endearment. The parties shall not permit the children to refer to anyone other than the parties (as may be applicable) by terms of endearment such as “Father,” “Dad,” “Daddy,” “Mother,” “Mom,” and/or “Mommy,” or any similar equivalents thereof.

2.11 Residence of Children. The parties shall at all times keep each other informed with respect to their respective residence and telephone numbers. Without court order or mutual agreement between the parties, neither shall remove the children’s primary residence from the State of New Jersey or to a location that significantly impairs the children’s ability to spend time with each parent.

2.12 Death of Either Party. In the event of either party’s death during the children’s minority, the surviving party shall have the immediate sole and exclusive custody of the children.

2.13 Transportation of Children during parenting time visitations. (Suggested addition)

ARTICLE III

COMMUNICATION BETWEEN THE PARTIES

3.1 Notification of Deviations From Timesharing Schedule. The parties agree to notify the other in writing of every vacation, summer “family reunion,” anticipated school trip by any child, college or prep school visit, healthcare provider (e.g., doctor, dentist, therapist, counselor, etc.) appointment, school conference, etc. Any planned trip or other deviation from the regular schedule that affects the other party’s regularly scheduled time or communication with any of the children must be agreed upon at least one week in advance in writing (“e-mail” will suffice) by the other party. Absent this written requirement, no deviation from the regular schedule shall be permitted.

3.2 “E-Mail” Communication. The primary means of communication between the parties shall be by “e-mail.” In this way, personal contact between the parties shall be minimized. Neither party shall be permitted to go to the other’s residence without the other’s prior written consent, except for purposes of picking up and dropping off the children for timesharing. The parties agree to dedicate approximately one-half hour a week every Sunday at 9:20 p.m., to “fine tune” the e-mail communication process and for each parent to inform the other about any recent events relating to the children.

ARTICLE IV

DISPUTE RESOLUTION REGARDING CUSTODYAND/OR VISITATION ISSUES

4.1 Monitor. The parties shall respond promptly to one another’s inquires on issues affecting the children and shall make themselves available for consultation and mutual decision-making. In the event the parties cannot agree on any course of action relating to the children, no such action shall be taken. To resolve any such dispute, the parties agree that _______________ (“the monitor”) shall be engaged for a period of twelve (12) months, as a monitor, to resolve same. The monitor shall assess and record allegations regarding issues of non-compliance, lack of cooperation, parental alienation and visitation sabotage and record same on a regular basis.

4.2 Meetings With Monitor. Either parent shall have the right to call a meeting with the monitor. After each meeting, the monitor shall provide a brief written report about the reasonableness of lack thereof of any allegations as well as the cooperation/lack of cooperation by either of the parents in addressing the same and in communicating with one another. At the end of such meeting the monitor shall consider assessing a fee for the meeting based on the evaluation, with the unreasonable or uncooperative parent being assessed the majority or full cost of the session. At the end of the twelve (12) month period, the monitor shall provide to the court a written report summarizing these meetings along with any recommendations with respect to any possible changes in the current custody/visitation agreement.

4.3 Enforcement of Parenting Rights. Nothing contained herein shall be construed as precluding a party from seeking enforcement by any remedy or procedure provided by law of any provision herein, or of any determination made by the monitor, or of any agreement between the parties in writing.

ARTICLE V

COUNSELING AND PARENTING GROUPS

5.1 Counseling for the Children. The parties acknowledge and agree that any or all of their children may require independent counseling to help them better adjust to the circumstances now existing or that may exist in the future. With the assistance of the monitor, either party may request that a child receiving counseling, or not. Such counseling may be reasonable and necessary to address not only each child’s feelings about the divorce, but also, parent/child role reversals, split loyalties, disengagement from symbiotic relationships, sibling rivalry, and poor academic performance.

5.2 Family Therapy. The parties agree that they and all of the children would benefit from a course of family therapy and agree to cooperate with same up[on the court’s immediate referral of the parties and the children to a qualified family counselor. The purpose of such counseling is to help the parties and each child better understand the present circumstances existing between them and facilitate a more positive, loving and respectful relationship between the parties and their children. The family counselor shall also meet with the parties, either separately or together, to address and help the parties on issues relating to improving their communication and cooperation skills with each other; avoiding unilateral decision-making on issues relating to the children’s health, education and welfare; avoiding either party’s attempts to dictate what the other party has planned during his/her parenting time; and to develop flexibility between the parties regarding parenting time issues. The schedule for and implementation of counseling shall be fixed by the family counselor after meeting with the parties on an individual basis. The parties agree that none of the children is emotionally competent to judge his or her need for family sessions, nor are they sufficiently mature enough to completely warrant their having the right to veto the occurrence of such sessions. In this regard, both parties shall actively support and encourage the children to attend such family therapy sessions.

ARTICLE VI

VIOLATIONS OF THIS AGREEMENT

6.1 Court Intervention and Sanctions. In the event any of the above provisions of this Agreement or any other written agreements about custody or visitation between parties is violated, such violation shall be immediately reported to the court and appropriate sanctions sought. If the court determines that either party in any manner id sabotaging the other’s communication and relationship with any of the children, or not reasonably cooperating with any of the relevant provisions contained herein, then the court may, among other possible sanctions, adjudicate the violating party in violation of the other party’s rights, assess counsel fees against the violating party, or, in a most serious situation, modify the existing custody and timesharing arrangement in order to protect the best interests of the children.

ARTICLE VII

MISCELLANEOUS PROVISIONS

7.1 Independent Legal Representation. The parties acknowledge that each has been represented by independent cousel with respect to the drafting and execution of this Agreement. Father has been represented by the law firm of _______, with offices located at _____________, and Mother has been represented by the law firm of _______, with offices located at _____________. The parties represent and acknowledge that each party’s independent counsel has fully reviewed and explained the legal and practical effect of this Agreement, and having the knowledge of such advise and with an understanding of the force and effect of this Agreement, each party signs the same voluntarily, of his or her own free will, and without undue influence, fraud, coercion or duress of any kind whatsoever excersied upon either of them by any person.

7.2 Non-Molestation and Interference. The parties agree that neither will molest, malign, disturb, or interfere with the other or the other’s relatives in any manner whatsoever. Each shall be free from interference, direct or indirect, by the other.

7.3 Voluntary Execution. The parties acknowledge and represent that this Agreement is fair and reasonable under the circumstances and that it is not te result of any fraud, duress or undue influence exercised by either party or third party upon either of them, and that each executes same voluntarily and of his or her own free will.

7.4 Incorporation of Agreement into Judgment. The parties understand and agree that a copy of this Agreement may be marked into evidence at the time of a final custody haring and may be incorporated by reference into any judgment entered in connection therewith. The parties further understand and agree that the incorporation of this Agreement shall not be deemed a merger of the Agreement into any such judgment, but rather the Agreement shall survive and stand independent of same.

7.5 Further Assurances. Each of the parties, from time to time, at the request of the other, shall execute, acknowledge and deliver to the other any and all further instruments and take such steps as may be reasonably required to give full force and effect to the provisions of this Agreement.

7.6 Waiver of Further Discovery. The parties acknowledge their understanding that each has been advised by their independent counsel of his or her right to obtain and take advantage of the several discovery tools available to litigants in a custody proceeding including, but not necessarily limited to, interrogatories, depositons, and requests to produce documents, etc. prior to the execution of this Agreement. However, each party further acknowledges that he or she feels the disclosures heretofore made by each other during the pendency of the underlying litigation and the settlement negotiations leading up to the execution of this Agreement is full, fair and complete for purposes of settling the instant custody dispute at this time pursuant to the terms and conditions contained in this Agreement, and each hereby waives his or her right to pursue any further discovery on the custod issue.

7.7 Negotiated Settlement. The parties acknowledge that the settlement terms reflected in this Agreement represent a compromise and negotiated settlement, and that each has actively participated with the assistance of independent counsel in the preparation of this Agreement. Additionally, the general drafting of this Agreement by the attorney for the Father shall have no bearing on its interpretation.

7.8 Mutual Releases. Except as may herein contained to the contrary, each party hereby releases and discharges, and by this Agreement does for himself or herself, and his or her legal heirs, representatives, executors, administrators, and assigns, releases and discharges the other of and from all causes of action, claims, rights or demands whatsoever, in law or in equity, which either party ever had or now has against the othr, except for any and all causes of action for custody and/or post-judgment enforcement applications to a court of competent jurisdiction.
7.9 Entire Understanding. This Agreement contains the entire understanding of the parties. There are no representations, warranties, covenants or undertakings other than those as expressly set forth herein.

7.10 Modification or Waiver. A modification or waiver of any of the provisions of this Agreement shall be effective when and only if made in writing and executed with the same formality as this Agreement. The failure of either party to insist upon strict performance of any of the provisions of this Agreement shall not be construed as w waiver of any subsequent default of the same or similar nature.

7.11 Situs. The place(s) of execution of this Agreement shall have no bearing on the law governing its interpretation, it being understood and agreed by both parties that the Agreement shall be construed and governed in accordance with the laws of the State of New Jersey, exclusive of conflict of laws principles.

7.12 Survivorship. This Agreement shall inure to the benefit of both parties, their heirs and assigns forever and shall be binding upon said parties, their heirs and assigns forever as otherwise stated herein.

7.13 Right to Trial. The parties acknowledge that each has been informed by their independent counsel of the right to have a court of competent jurisdiction determine all issues arising out of their custody dispute. Each party voluntarily and knowingly waives this right, and accepts the terms of this Agreement as being final, complete and binding as to all issues arising out of the instant custody dispute.

7.14 Review of Agreement. The parties acknowledge that they have read and reviewd this Agreement in its entirety, with their respective counsel, prior to signing.

7.15 Agreement as Evidence. This Agreement may be offered into evidence by either party in any action or proceeding of any nature in which it may be material or relevant.

7.16 Article and Sub-part Headings. The headings of the several articles and subdivisions of this Agreement are inserted solely for the convenience of reference and shall have no further meaning, force or effect.

7.17 Communication Information. For so long as any provision contained herein remains unfulfilled, each party agrees to keep the other informed of his or her residence and telephone number or of such other places or telephone numbers where he or she may readily receive communications.

7.18 Severability. In the event any provision contained in this Agreement, either in whole or in part, is deemed or held to be invalid or unenforceble by any court of competent jurisdiction, the remainder of any partially declared invalid or unenforceable provision and all other provisions of the Agreement shall, nontheless, remain and continue in full force and effect.

7.19 Effective Date of Agreement. Except as may be specifically indicated otherwise, the effective date of this Agreement shall be the date on which it is fully executed by both parties.

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, the parties have hereunto set their hands and seals the day and year on which their signatures are acknowledged.

Witness for the Father

______________________________ ____________________________________

Witness for the Mother

______________________________ ____________________________________

STATE OF NEW JERSEY ....)
................................................) ss:
COUNTY OF __________ _ )

BE IT REMEMBERED that on this _______ day of _______, [year], before me, the subscriber an Attorney of Law of the State of New Jersey personally appeared _____________ who I am satisfied is the individual named in and who executed the foregoing agreement, and to whom I first made known the contents thereof, and thereupon that he acknowledged that he signed, sealed and delivered the same as his voluntary act and deed for the uses and purposed therein expressed.

_________________________________________

STATE OF NEW JERSEY.... )
................................................) ss:
COUNTY OF __________ _ )

BE IT REMEMBERED that on this _______ day of _______, [year], before me, the subscriber an Attorney of Law of the State of New Jersey personally appeared _____________ who I am satisfied is the individual named in and who executed the foregoing agreement, and to whom I first made known the contents thereof, and thereupon that she acknowledged that she signed, sealed and delivered the same as her voluntary act and deed for the uses and purposed therein expressed.

_________________________________________